What I Learned From Being Robbed At Gunpoint

F65E20DF-2986-4170-A777-231768BB6796.JPG


Just because we don’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not there.


This is such a valuable lesson that I’ve struggled with for the past few weeks.


So, I lived with this story, until I was able to understand it to release it. See, I know you KNOW this stuff, but actually practicing it and living it, is a totally different thing. For, you need to practice these beliefs in order to rewire our brains and habits.


Last Friday night I was watching Planet Blue 2, with Sam. We chose to watch an episode on the depths of the Antarctic Ocean. This particular episode took you down to the bottom of the ocean of the Antarctic, a place that is called the “Midnight Hour”.

I mean, I’m legit afraid of what’s THAT far down in the water. It can be equally as comparable to outer space, we just know NOTHING about it  and yet, we can label it as scary. 


Isn’t it funny, how something dark, and unknown, automatically triggers fear? How are we so sure that it’s NOT the safest place ever? Would you completely rule out that one day we’d all be living underwater?


Anyways, my point being is that there were fish down there that were like completely unimaginable. MASSIVE fish with translucent heads, so they can see above them while they’re swimming as a method of protection.


As we descended further and further into the ocean, more and more sea life appeared. 


It wasn’t until David Attenborough’s soothing voice announced that 90% of all the fish population actually lives in this depth - and that we’ve only discovered 10% in the shallow waters.

WOW, isn’t that fascinating - and the perfect metaphor for life?


I speak about abundance with my clients in a similar matter - just because we can’t see all of our prosperity, doesn’t mean it isn’t there. Without doing this work I would never have known that 90% of abundance exists in darkness. I would have continued to live my life convinced that most of the good stuff lives in the light.

I could go on, for the epiphany is exceptionally strong. There’s so much we can speak about in terms of contrast, that 90% of our lessons come from our moments of immense growth and that only 10% of what we experience in the light is fabricated based on experience. 


Any mistakes we may have made, and wrongs we have right, have taught us so much in our lives, that we can become grateful for blood, sweat, and tears. Without wading in the deep end we would never know how to swim.

IMG_0087.jpg



When it comes to money and abundance; whether it’s the new apartment, or car, or jacket… we think we can only purchase, receive or get something a certain way. For example, working 40 hours a week equals a pay cheque which we will save to eventually purchase something we want.


Have we ever thought of opening ourselves up wholeheartedly to that 90% that we have yet to discover?


So, for anyone who is struggling to create their goals this year - or anyone who is confident about what they want to achieve, listen up.


Never act surprise when we come face to face with contrast for we created this.


So, you maybe asking yourself why you’d ever create shitty contrast, like being held at gunpoint at a robbery in Mexico City?


Well, in summary, I created this experience so I could learn and step back onto my path of alignment. These moments of intense darkness are in reality, an honest and accurate mirror of how I feel about myself. I didn’t trust my intuition, because I didn’t think it mattered. What I am really saying is that I don’t trust myself period.

The first step is to take accountability for everything for you are always in the driver seat and you are directing the car and the direction it's going. 

752ACC58-EFF3-4F94-B810-D9A21040A3C1.JPG




So, this is what I learned while being robbed at gunpoint.




I’m an overly confidant traveller, I’ve been to many “sketchy” countries, and I honestly have a preference for them. Never have I ever been touched and I let my guard down for a minute, I got confidant and that was all I needed to put my life in danger.





We were on our way to the Mexico City stadium to watch the finals between Cruz Azul and America in a 120K person stadium. I didn’t even want to go to the game, which is unusual for me, because I’m always down to watch football. This day, I was feeling quite sick and so I decided that I would take a nap to see how I felt.




I couldn’t sleep, so I meditated for about an hour in bed, asking my intuition for guidance, and normally when I’m in this state, I ask myself - okay, how am I feeling and where am I currently at, physically? That usually tells me that I’m looking to stay home tonight - but the crowd was so excited so I decided to push myself to go. I’ve done this countless times and its as only this time where I felt it was fatal, and I will never, ever again ignore my intuition.




I had a second thought of leaving my bag behind, which included my phone, purse, glasses, essential oils and at the last minute decided to take it with me.



I could honestly go on with the signs….but I’ll jump to the scene of the crime.



So, we hit rush hour traffic in Mexico City - which is by far the worst traffic I have ever experienced - 20 million people trying to get around the city creates an insane bumper to bumper traffic - which we were in for over 4 hours long. We’re like sitting ducks, waiting to move.



2 hours had passed by and our Uber driver decided to take a short cut. My buddy hopped out of the car at a local OXXO to get his tickets printed for the game. I felt extremely unsettled in the area. I asked his father if he knew the neighbourhood and if it was safe to use the washroom - he wasn’t sure so Sam said he would escort me. 



Again, the signs were so clear, we were parked right beside a lamp post, so it was extremely difficult to get out of the car. Sam and I had to squeeze out, it was like the universe was telling us to stay put and we didn’t listen. So, of course we made our way to the shop grabbed a bag of chips, because there wasn’t a washroom and the three of us headed back into the car. 



Like clockwork, as soon, as I re-entered the car, my stomach dropped. I looked up the street and saw group of hooded men. I stopped myself from saying aloud “I feel uncomfortable, and those men look really sketchy”. Before I knew it, it was too late. 



Stuck in a skinny row of cars backed in front and behind another, we heard a bang on the window. I looked up and I originally thought the men were asking for directions (that’s how naive I can be).



Before I knew it, 4 guys, with 4 pistols pointed at us through the glass window circled the car.


I was paralyzed in my seat, my heart started racing and I could feel my adrenaline pumping. Everyone refused to give their stuff over, and only did so until they threatened to shoot every single one of us in the car, until we were dead.



So my buddy handed over his stuff, soon sam did, and they grabbed my purse. With the gun pointed right at my head , I prayed to god for protection, I brought in Arch Angel Michael and I saw the vehicle in bright white light.



I kid you not my life flashed before my eyes, if you ask the others what happened in the car, some of them blacked out, and I was fully acute and awake, I saw the faces of my offenders and I saw pain.


I’m so thankful to be alive, and for this. I know that those men needed my money, cards and phone more than I needed it myself. I see them in their light for they have taught me some valuable lessons.



One thing stood out very clearly to me -  those are just things, yes expensive things, but nobody got hurt and it could’ve been so much worse. I could’ve been sitting on the side, instead of the middle of the vehicle and I could’ve been pulled out or kidnapped. You never know, and I know this, I was divinely protected that night. The angels, the ascended masters, and my guides were there to keep me safe and reinstall my trust with faith.


I’ve been in my darkness for some time now. I’ve been extremely shaky and wobbly since that happened in mid-December. Until now, I can see, understand, and live the lessons it taught me.



Never turn your back on your intuition - no matter how many times have we “force” ourselves to do something even as simple as going out to dinner on a Tuesday night. Trust yourself, honour your inner guidance and always do what you need and what you want.


Stop serving other people, you only have 1 life to live, and that life is with you. You cannot fully serve anyone authentically, if your tank is half full. It is selfish to help others and expect them to fill your tank. Do what you need to feel physically, spiritually, and emotionally sound.



This 90% of darkness I’ve been hanging out in needed to happen. If I were to spiritually bypass this, I would surely suffer from PTSD. And this darkness has taught me SO much abundance, and I’m still willing to stay here until I learn it completely. 



It’s easy to worry about having to buy new things when they’re gone, but one thing is for certain is the love that comes with trusting source, your faith, the universe. When we place our emphasis on the effects, like money, clients, job opportunities, we miss the point entirely. It’s not about those outcomes, it’s about our willingness to trust, even when times are really hard, whether or not you’re faced with death.


If you’re standing in that 10% of light, see what else you can open yourself up to. 



My approach is simple, dear universe, let me use this law to show me what I need to change. We’re working with our “inner world” our unconscious beliefs, that we need to wake up to , in order to live incredible and abundant lives. Developing this awareness starts by choosing to humbly witness our contrast and willingness to change the “unseen" 

41C56E80-DC11-4F05-9A45-6ED86611AF58.JPG



So what could have brought on a robbery at gunpoint?


My unwillingness to let my ego subside and be liked, how about fear of missing out, or the universe teaching me to let go of my attachment to things, like money or technology. Perhaps, it was showing me what true love looks and feels like.

There could be a long lists of “what-ifs” and lessons. there’s one thing that has stood out for me as certain.

After that incident, I’m no longer afraid of the 90% of darkness, it’s showing me where I can shine my light and it’s always going to realign me on my path. Never doubt yourself for a minute, and trust that the universe has our best interest at heart. Sometimes in order to see clearly, we have to experience intense moments of doubt in order to choose the light.

I want to leave you with a final thought of not to live in fear that this will happen to you - we all lead extremely unique lives, and this was my lesson to learn, not yours. Don’t be afraid of the unknown, for it has SO much to teach us. It’s like a treasure chest unveiling the juiciest gold we could ever imagine.

xoxo Tori





Tori Swanson